Five Proven Anger Control Methods
- Resist negatively judging your partner. Seek positive ways to interpret your partner’s behavior, so you will be less upset or not upset at all with what he or she has done.
- Don’t keep a score. When you are upset with something your partner has done, “forgive and forget.” Don’t hold on to your negative judgment about your partner and angry feelings and use them as fuel to feed additional negative thoughts. This will only lead to additional anger and escalated conflict, you and your entire family will then suffer the consequences.
- Be humble. Don’t get angry when things don’t go your way. Anger is an aggressive emotion to try and force things to be the way you want them to be. Whatever the situation is, try to accept as much as you can. Acceptance will eliminate anger, and this will lead to peace and harmony with your partner.
- Share and Negotiate. If there is something your partner does that you cannot just accept as recommended above, calmly and respectfully share your thoughts and, when appropriate, negotiate a solution agreeable to both of you rather than using anger to impose what you want. In most situations, if you can’t negotiate a solution, it is better to ‘give in’ than ‘get angry.’ When you stay calm using your anger management skills, you will be able to decide what is the best approach to getting what you want.
- Stay calm. If you become angry, stop talking. Do something else until you calm down. When you are angry, everyone around you is hurt including you, and the point you are trying to make is lost in the flood of negative emotions. Whatever it is that you are unhappy with, you will only get your point across when you are calm! Use your anger management to calm yourself down, then tell the offending person what you want or what you don’t want. When you follow these anger management guidelines, this will lead to peace and harmony in your relationship!
